Gems of TV

 It isn't the pandemic that produced such gems though; 

as we have been seeing those crazy things 

popping up on our small screens for years... 

It has become hard to distinguish now... 

Nancy or Barb ~ Pelosi or Shark Lady? 

It's all the shame... er... same!  

...and children's fare shares the same time slots with... 

There's something for every taste - at any time 

as specialty channels, paradoxically, have lost their meaning 

"MTV" for instance...

"MTV" does not stand for MUSIC TELEVISION anymore!

That was then: 

This is now: 

MEH TV - maybe? 

Trekkies are well-served, however... 

I am not much of a Trekkie; not sure who this is: 

I had forgotten Lurch himself had dropped by... 

Again - not sure who this is...  

A red shirt! A dead... beat? 

Space: 1999 (2999?)  >  all the Star Treks 

And this is Majel - isn't it? 

Majel ~ Naked! 

Gene must be rolling in his grave! 

Scandal Trek! 

Although Lurch enjoyed that... looks like! 

Uncle Fester would have liked it more! 

Why you crying, Iceboy? Because 

Space: The Imagination Station 

is no more? 

(It became quite unimaginatively enough "CTV Sci-Fi Channel" - 

the Canadian version of the other one!) 

Oh - we see why now...! 

Never could get into that "Killjoys" show though... 

...time to change the channel! 

It is hard to believe what one can find these days 

when you flip them channels long enough...! 

Nerds will be impressed... 

But not Angie! 

Let's keep on flipping channels... 

and the resorts...? 

This looks fixed! 

...now that was a Dark Day for TV... 

...what a luminous idea... 

A LUMINOUS SOLUTION

but wait - remember this?

hmm... 

CHEAP SCI-FI is just the thing to... DISTRACT you. 

And if that doesn't work... 

There's TV fare nowadays that make the stuff 

like we used to have in the weird 90s 

appear very tame in sheer comparison...

Xena...? It was a children's show in comparison with that! 

...still can't remember who this is though...

but yeah - there's worse yet: 

*REALITY TV* 

...and the rest... 

There might be some flicks worth your time, 

one of those evenings... 

once in a blue or full moon... 

Maybe the odd new TOON, also...? 

...and all those reruns...

And don't forget the Superheroes! 

...some remakes in there, for good measure... 

It detracts from the dreary newscasts... 

But when the commercials are the most 

entertaining thing on any given time slot... 

Luminous ~ and Radiant too! 

That's the CW for ya! 

NETFLIX is... another beast though 

...not to be confused with...

LOL 

...yeah yeah yeah... 

I was too lazy to crop most of these! 

Okaaaay... 

On second thought, that much... choice 

and eclecticness (?) 

(thickness?) 

makes you wanna veer back towards 

boring traditional TV 

real quick! 

Quick as a Flash! 

It might be LOCAL CRAP - 

but, at least, it is FREE CRAP too! 

...all those CW shows... 

...can't quite keep up with how many there are... 

...now that didn't last long - did it? 

A commercial = excellent excuse to flip channels again 

huh - what? 

oh - just another commercial. 

There's another one! 

And so it has gotten to this now: 

it is a battle between the TV - and Netflix! 

With such, ah... offerings - TV can only lose! 

But then the strangest thing happens: 

it wins anyway... with the local free crap! 

And its witty commercials: 

York mode... rrright. 

Yerkk! 

And speaking of poor taste: 

somebody still bothers to broadcast episodes of DALLAS! 

I had completely forgotten about J.R.'s itty bitty trophy wifey... 

whatshername??? 

And this is a former Charlie's Angel - right? 

Let's move on before Victoria Principal 

and her Bobby show up...

Ugh - damn... LOCAL TV. 

Yup... with local talent like that... 

We can safely turn off completely now! 

Come on remote - bring me to higher ground! 

...nice try... 

HA ~ you don't see Marvel doing that! 

Just like you don't see them at all - at the Oscars! 

LOLOLOLOLOLOL 

...whatever they were trying to do there... 

(symbolism?) 

{Illuminati?} 

Ahh ~ a cruise... and to Portugal, on top of that! 

A cruise would have been so good... 

But, by then, the worldwide pandemic had gone full tilt 

and I am sure Chef Bonacini here 

and his buddies at Emerald Waterways 

wound up canceling this one... 

LOCKDOWN TIME ~ and if we still have wanderlust 

that's what specialty channels like this one are for: 

...although, somehow, we wind up right back at 

watching that same grimy urban crime fare... 

As if stunning, splendid seahorses such as these... 

...were not more interesting than these sordid lurid details???

The morbid fascination such things exert, sometimes...! 

... same thing goes for STOCKS... 

...and those headlines there; 

Give us some LEVERAGE ~ please! 

Grown-up ELECTRIC COMPANY... is it? 

Gimme some BOSTON...! 

But speaking of dolls... 

That PLAYLIST GAL there... on that silly new concept for a sitcom...

they break into song all the time, y'know... whatever it is called... 

(the sitcom/musical - it's getting canceled soon, come on! 

Looking out for her here - what her NEXT ROLE might be...)

er... not my metro

,,,anyway...

Now that's but another of the billions of liplocks of the sort 

that we are subjected to on the CW's Lesbians of Tomorrow...

Er... That is... Legends of Tomorrow - yes! 

Let's, er.... change the channel already! 

Now that's not the same kind of "kiss" as we've seen 

on Legends of Tomorrow... no. 

Flash-forward to the end! 

That's... Young Sheldon! 

Before he was young Sheldon, that is; a bit part 

in one of the Conjuring movies...!!!  Ugh! 

...so much for the multi-capacity of this new 

digital cable 

and smart TV...!!! 

Y'know... watching so much TV 

(between the years 2020-2022 that is; 

after years of not watching so much... 

2010 to 2019 really!) 

in on-and-off lockdown/confinement... 

in this neverending pandemic... 

YEAH - it does feel like YOU ARE 

ASKING FOR IT...!!! 

...looks ignorant and/or uneducated t'me! 

...with news like these... 

We're better off seeking refuge in CW fantasy indeed: 

hopefully they get their facts straight like this: 

But yeah - talking about HOLLYWOOD... 

Enough making do with the inferior TV fare; 

let's go for the movies! Let's find them: 

...and this... is from a "DOG" movie (don't ask) 

my... barely any better than the most common sitcom: 

...keep trying...

Wow... They had short films - very short films... until they didn't anymore. 

Something else then ~ anything else!!! 

A ghost story ~ perhaps?

MUSIC then? 

...completely forgot what she even sounds like - ugh! 

Let's all find out, huh?  Here and now: 

...OK, let's move on to sports... 

...look at the ticker...

And that was only the beginning! 

HELP! 

...anyone... 

...catch the end credits of a certain movie and...

WOW... that was depressing. 

MISSING COMMERCIALS, all of a sudden... 

...since 1966, apparently! 

No one - absolutely no one - wants to age... hmm? 

Rrright... 

Right on time for... 

Ahh... that's why it sucks then: 

Chi-Town is built on SAND 

But that's enough HISTORY now...!

Forget the DCEU and that MCU too; 

Brightburn Universe promises you 

one hell of a bumpy ride...!!! 

...but this gal... 

...though she LOOKS like she's in control...

(can't resist temptation to say it...) 

SHE IS LARGE AND IN CHARGE! 

Or so it appears to be... 

However, in truth... 

She has no control whatsoever on the 

weather that she is forecasting there! 

NO ONE has "control" 

- much less the make-believe totally bogus 

stupor-zeroes!!! 

#ButThat'sAnotherStory 

Italian TV now - for a laugh? 

We have sitcoms to rival that ~ now... 

...as long as it's gonna last...

(won't be long!) 

FUNNY is NOT as it used to be...

Humor doesn't work... NEWS are depressing... 

MOVIES and all other fiction is MEH... 

REALITY TV?  NO THANKS! 

Verily, in confinement, the only true solace to be found 

is a good book - THE GOOD BOOK - and 

God Is with us!

That was... Time Well Wasted ~ alright! 

Three years (almost) watching television 

during what appears to be 

the early years of 

THE APOCALYPSE!