Blogger, Blogger, On The Screen - Tell Me Who Is The King That Can Make Them Scream?
When it comes to content, each and every two-bit ''provider'' can lay claim to the title of ''Preeminent Provider'' simply by pilfering the news, scavenging through factoids and trivia left and right, rummaging through all the dirt laid out by any Hollywood-Bollywood-or-Nollywood ''somebody'' that wants to specifically attain or maintain a certain notoriety by making oneself the object of attention like that - so obviously that it is painful to behold, at times.
In other words, in order to dig out all of this garbage, all of this ''content'' as they say, it doesn't take all that much effort at all.
The art is entirely and wholly in what one makes of that dirt once freshly (or not so freshly - for some has extensible and considerable ''shelf life'' if you will...) dug out and exposed to one's audience, in whatever medium it may be...
Good old Jay (''live like Jay'' - no, that's not the Jay in question here...) used to be at his funniest simply by presenting and commenting upon totally genuine bits of news, clipped from newspapers by his large staff of ''humor experts'' backstage... Sometimes, it was not even an article but just the headline, with a huge oversight: some unforgivable typo right in the middle of it... Other times, it was simply an ad, a strange photograph or a slightly bizarre choice of words for a caption on one; something that could lend itself to multiple comical interpretations, obviously... Even if it had but one, easy, gross joke in it: that was all Jay needed to make it worthwhile his airtime. And, oftentimes, such jokes were even funnier than anything he had said in his opening monologue too...
But that was Leno - this is now!
Such ''raw materials'' are readily available for all to use - on their twitter, tumblr, pinterest, reddit, stumble-upon or whatever it's called, instagram (oops, I still didn't start mine there!) --- of course! (Duh.)
So, anyone can be as funny as the once (and-future? Again?!?) ''king of late night television'' - huh?
Right as we ''blog'' here, the competition is fierce among those who saw the torches passed into their hands, just for that: to be FUNNY. To be consistently and assuredly witty and amusing or, at the very least, to be able to extirpate a real (as opposed to pre-recorded, ''in the can'' or totally bogus) laugh from the crowd; now, thank God those days are over, eh? But that's another story...
What are the forces in presence now? Conan is but a barbarian relegated to TBS these days: he's out of the loop and doesn't have to jump through hoops for the ''major networks'' anymore... Those who are playing this game, still, are: that guy from SNL News, Seth? Not the same Seth (and match point - not!) who plays with toys all the time on the insufferable Robot Chicken show - again, thank God! No, this is an entirely different Seth here... (And yes, just for the record, I prefer my chicken roasted with fine herbs and garlic; not with any cyborg parts, thank you very much! But that's... just me!)
Seth has taken Conan's spot on the old scheme of things. Is he (or his predecessor, for that matter) that good at ''making something out of nothing'' (to be Seinfeldesque for a bit here?) in order to amuse his audiences, both live as on the airwaves? I can barely stay awake to watch either one of them, these days, so the answer would be a resounding don't think so, at this point! Too bad guys - keep trying!
On the same time slot as Seth, but playing second fiddle to the lone veteran left in the game, is one Craig... A Craig who evokes memories of a series of other ''trial hosts'' who were coming out of the woodwork at some point: one of them eventually became an actor (that one would be Greg; and that ''transformation'' alone proves, in and by itself, that GOD AND HEAVEN both ARE FOR REAL! Right, Greg? No answer... It's okay: God Himself Doesn't Answer, either, so...)
Now Craig's ''Late Late Show'' is kind of lame to say the least: a former sitcom cast member -and not a particularly memorable one at that- Craig is British... and it shows. Oftentimes he simply goes with the flow, the ebb and the tide, as when he embraced the masses' tendency to ridicule a certain sea hero and his series of skits on the subject were simply him, dressed up as the hero, reading his mail and giving out advice afterwards - Craig-style, not even in character. Some thespian thee art, Craig. Some talk-show host, too! And some ''creator of content'' overall... If one word came to mind to describe his overall contribution to television, ''uninspired'' would be it.
His boss, Dave, is just doing what he's been doing for decades now: inspiring himself from the news for his opening monologues and ''top tens'' (easily the best moments of each and every single late show for quite a lot of years now...) and why change, at this point? You cannot teach an old dog new tricks anyhow: and, besides, this has worked with the type of audience he has and there is absolutely no need to fix it if it ain't broken - hmm? It's too late for that now, anyway; Dave is et for retirement soon and Stephen will be coming onboard to replace him... (Beware of the Curse of Conan now, Colbert!!!)
Opposite old-time Dave are the two Jimmys: now, quite obviously, you see me coming here, don't you? The two Jimmys quite simply cancel each other out!!! Both employ the exact same tactics in order to attract attention and gain more viewers: they try and create not only content but event too! Bogus feuds (although, it is true that, sometimes, it is hard to decipher between real and bogus here; or shoot and kayfabe, to borrow terms from that other circus-like industry at this time...! They have tons in common with this one, I tell you! But that's another... blog post aborning here, surely!) and scripted lovers' spats spilling out onto social media consistently aliments the show's proceedings. Without such an influx, the shows would evidently be quite empty and hollow things, now wouldn't they? The quarrel between one Jimmy and Kanye (the Kanye - is there any other one?) was one of the most memorable examples of this wasting of everyone's time, really: and, in the end, it wasn't even great television to watch too! The other Jimmy, meanwhile, has been seen lately trying to pick a fight with former talk-show host Pat - over his tweets on twitter, of all things (likely bogus tweets were fabricated - and Pat wouldn't sue, since he desperately wants the attention and gave his consent au préalable...! As long as he doesn't make recurrent appearances over this now... Keep spinning the wheel, Pat - they need you there...)
That same Jimmy got involved in the world of sports at some point, too; NHL hockey to be more specific. He saw that his local team was set to accomplish something, at long last (facing a lowly opponent from north of the border instead of the appointed, rightful superior competition that he had been on a collision course with from the onset of those playoffs... Hey, it is the playoffs: sh!t happens...) and so, smelling the opportunity for an easy laugh at the expense of an inferior bunch that had no business being there at all -one that had a very goofy-looking mascot on top of that- Jimmy challenged the foreign franchise, betting on the outcome of that playoff series... Hmm, now, isn't that reprehensible, to bet on sports events? Oh, not anymore? What century am I living on, eh? Right? Carry on then... The goofy-looking mascot (and goofier-looking mayor, north of the border) paid the price for accepting the bet with Jimmy: one had to make a series of pictures all across his hometown, looking more than dejected while wearing -on top of his mascot costume- the jersey of the winner, the New York Rangers... The other had to eat an unsavory New York bagel right in front of his decrepit City Hall there - which was, incidentally, just fine for the shooting of the dystopian, bleakest-of-futures-possible waste of celluloid that is the latest X-Men flick...! (Yeah; it's another story!)
The Jimmys try to make themselves ''current'' - by directly commenting, addressing and even tackling the news makers of the day -previous day, really- they can insert themselves in said news and become relevant all of a sudden: it is a great tactic that reeks of the great power bestowed upon them by those mighty networks there... However, it is misused very badly. For (speaking of the X-Weirdos...) haven't they ever heard that expression somehow put together one day, one night, in some very decrepit building, too, in New York: Stan, the man, who, inspiring himself from a thousand-and-one other sources as well, came up with that catchy phrase: ''with great power comes great responsibility''...? These Jimmys here have been given a great power indeed: the ability to reach into millions upon millions of households, each and every night: and what are they doing with that? Racking in as much commercial revenue as possible for their respective networks - that's about it! Now that's enough to make Kanye extremely sad, Jimmy... And that must be making Drew sad too... er, Jimmy? (This one's for the latter Jimmy now: remember the joy you and Drew felt when that famous curse was ''reversed'' there - at least it was make-believe joy, on the set of the movie you guys made about it? That sentiment should have accompanied you onto this new venture - especially as it is a long-term one... Somehow, I don't feel it; in every sketch, every interview, every skit... I just do not feel ''it'' there... And that is sad, indeed. Thank God (?) now that Drew has found new friends to wipe her tears away - considering what a roller-coaster ride the Red Sox season has been so far, too... But that's... something else!)
In both cases, of course, the tradition of an opening monologue is dutifully honored: and anything and everything can be used as cannon-fodder for the joke-du-jour here. There appears to be no subject too touchy for this process nowadays: if it's in the news, it can be used, end of story! Now, if such handling of taboo topics was done in a spirit of ''let's make people conscientious of things, open up their perspective, invite them to take action and improve things around them'' on a consistent basis, rather than simply ''create content'' to amuse and diffuse, ultimately, attention by deviating it towards themselves in order to help their ratings... It would be entirely different, then.
But it is not - and will never be.
If either one of the Jimmys truly ''gets involved'' during any given interview, with any given guest, at any given time - it is, once again, just to extirpate the maximum of mirth from an otherwise ordinary, even boring bloke sometimes...
Now imagine if either Jimmy - or any one of the other guys presently doing this; or anyone who has ever been given the chance to do this - imagine if they had had the mind of a visionary, the wit of an innovator, the sharpness of a revolutionary? They could seize the opportunity given to them here and become the catalyst of much-needed change, be it social, economical or otherwise...! However, Johnny himself never bothered; he was only too content to rake in the dough for his golden retirement fund, and that was pretty much it. None of his predecessors did much towards that either; so why would any of the new guys dare - and risk getting booted off their soapbox in the process?
I jest, in reality - but one remembers Morton still, no? Some sort of activism, on a parallel with all that fluff generated for the shows, can be desired and can be worthy too... (And no: not even Jon does that - not even him...)
Otherwise, it is all meaningless fluff indeed, easily consumed and just as easily discarded...
For who will preserve recordings of any of these skits, monologues and assorted ''TV moments'' nowadays: who will even bother to make up a playlist on YouTube with any of it?
No one - save the network itself, that is!
Why? Because all this ''content'' is trivial at best - when it is controversial, there is no meat to the bone - if you know what I am screaming here...?
In other words, in order to dig out all of this garbage, all of this ''content'' as they say, it doesn't take all that much effort at all.
The art is entirely and wholly in what one makes of that dirt once freshly (or not so freshly - for some has extensible and considerable ''shelf life'' if you will...) dug out and exposed to one's audience, in whatever medium it may be...
Good old Jay (''live like Jay'' - no, that's not the Jay in question here...) used to be at his funniest simply by presenting and commenting upon totally genuine bits of news, clipped from newspapers by his large staff of ''humor experts'' backstage... Sometimes, it was not even an article but just the headline, with a huge oversight: some unforgivable typo right in the middle of it... Other times, it was simply an ad, a strange photograph or a slightly bizarre choice of words for a caption on one; something that could lend itself to multiple comical interpretations, obviously... Even if it had but one, easy, gross joke in it: that was all Jay needed to make it worthwhile his airtime. And, oftentimes, such jokes were even funnier than anything he had said in his opening monologue too...
But that was Leno - this is now!
Such ''raw materials'' are readily available for all to use - on their twitter, tumblr, pinterest, reddit, stumble-upon or whatever it's called, instagram (oops, I still didn't start mine there!) --- of course! (Duh.)
So, anyone can be as funny as the once (and-future? Again?!?) ''king of late night television'' - huh?
Right as we ''blog'' here, the competition is fierce among those who saw the torches passed into their hands, just for that: to be FUNNY. To be consistently and assuredly witty and amusing or, at the very least, to be able to extirpate a real (as opposed to pre-recorded, ''in the can'' or totally bogus) laugh from the crowd; now, thank God those days are over, eh? But that's another story...
What are the forces in presence now? Conan is but a barbarian relegated to TBS these days: he's out of the loop and doesn't have to jump through hoops for the ''major networks'' anymore... Those who are playing this game, still, are: that guy from SNL News, Seth? Not the same Seth (and match point - not!) who plays with toys all the time on the insufferable Robot Chicken show - again, thank God! No, this is an entirely different Seth here... (And yes, just for the record, I prefer my chicken roasted with fine herbs and garlic; not with any cyborg parts, thank you very much! But that's... just me!)
Seth has taken Conan's spot on the old scheme of things. Is he (or his predecessor, for that matter) that good at ''making something out of nothing'' (to be Seinfeldesque for a bit here?) in order to amuse his audiences, both live as on the airwaves? I can barely stay awake to watch either one of them, these days, so the answer would be a resounding don't think so, at this point! Too bad guys - keep trying!
On the same time slot as Seth, but playing second fiddle to the lone veteran left in the game, is one Craig... A Craig who evokes memories of a series of other ''trial hosts'' who were coming out of the woodwork at some point: one of them eventually became an actor (that one would be Greg; and that ''transformation'' alone proves, in and by itself, that GOD AND HEAVEN both ARE FOR REAL! Right, Greg? No answer... It's okay: God Himself Doesn't Answer, either, so...)
Now Craig's ''Late Late Show'' is kind of lame to say the least: a former sitcom cast member -and not a particularly memorable one at that- Craig is British... and it shows. Oftentimes he simply goes with the flow, the ebb and the tide, as when he embraced the masses' tendency to ridicule a certain sea hero and his series of skits on the subject were simply him, dressed up as the hero, reading his mail and giving out advice afterwards - Craig-style, not even in character. Some thespian thee art, Craig. Some talk-show host, too! And some ''creator of content'' overall... If one word came to mind to describe his overall contribution to television, ''uninspired'' would be it.
His boss, Dave, is just doing what he's been doing for decades now: inspiring himself from the news for his opening monologues and ''top tens'' (easily the best moments of each and every single late show for quite a lot of years now...) and why change, at this point? You cannot teach an old dog new tricks anyhow: and, besides, this has worked with the type of audience he has and there is absolutely no need to fix it if it ain't broken - hmm? It's too late for that now, anyway; Dave is et for retirement soon and Stephen will be coming onboard to replace him... (Beware of the Curse of Conan now, Colbert!!!)
Opposite old-time Dave are the two Jimmys: now, quite obviously, you see me coming here, don't you? The two Jimmys quite simply cancel each other out!!! Both employ the exact same tactics in order to attract attention and gain more viewers: they try and create not only content but event too! Bogus feuds (although, it is true that, sometimes, it is hard to decipher between real and bogus here; or shoot and kayfabe, to borrow terms from that other circus-like industry at this time...! They have tons in common with this one, I tell you! But that's another... blog post aborning here, surely!) and scripted lovers' spats spilling out onto social media consistently aliments the show's proceedings. Without such an influx, the shows would evidently be quite empty and hollow things, now wouldn't they? The quarrel between one Jimmy and Kanye (the Kanye - is there any other one?) was one of the most memorable examples of this wasting of everyone's time, really: and, in the end, it wasn't even great television to watch too! The other Jimmy, meanwhile, has been seen lately trying to pick a fight with former talk-show host Pat - over his tweets on twitter, of all things (likely bogus tweets were fabricated - and Pat wouldn't sue, since he desperately wants the attention and gave his consent au préalable...! As long as he doesn't make recurrent appearances over this now... Keep spinning the wheel, Pat - they need you there...)
That same Jimmy got involved in the world of sports at some point, too; NHL hockey to be more specific. He saw that his local team was set to accomplish something, at long last (facing a lowly opponent from north of the border instead of the appointed, rightful superior competition that he had been on a collision course with from the onset of those playoffs... Hey, it is the playoffs: sh!t happens...) and so, smelling the opportunity for an easy laugh at the expense of an inferior bunch that had no business being there at all -one that had a very goofy-looking mascot on top of that- Jimmy challenged the foreign franchise, betting on the outcome of that playoff series... Hmm, now, isn't that reprehensible, to bet on sports events? Oh, not anymore? What century am I living on, eh? Right? Carry on then... The goofy-looking mascot (and goofier-looking mayor, north of the border) paid the price for accepting the bet with Jimmy: one had to make a series of pictures all across his hometown, looking more than dejected while wearing -on top of his mascot costume- the jersey of the winner, the New York Rangers... The other had to eat an unsavory New York bagel right in front of his decrepit City Hall there - which was, incidentally, just fine for the shooting of the dystopian, bleakest-of-futures-possible waste of celluloid that is the latest X-Men flick...! (Yeah; it's another story!)
The Jimmys try to make themselves ''current'' - by directly commenting, addressing and even tackling the news makers of the day -previous day, really- they can insert themselves in said news and become relevant all of a sudden: it is a great tactic that reeks of the great power bestowed upon them by those mighty networks there... However, it is misused very badly. For (speaking of the X-Weirdos...) haven't they ever heard that expression somehow put together one day, one night, in some very decrepit building, too, in New York: Stan, the man, who, inspiring himself from a thousand-and-one other sources as well, came up with that catchy phrase: ''with great power comes great responsibility''...? These Jimmys here have been given a great power indeed: the ability to reach into millions upon millions of households, each and every night: and what are they doing with that? Racking in as much commercial revenue as possible for their respective networks - that's about it! Now that's enough to make Kanye extremely sad, Jimmy... And that must be making Drew sad too... er, Jimmy? (This one's for the latter Jimmy now: remember the joy you and Drew felt when that famous curse was ''reversed'' there - at least it was make-believe joy, on the set of the movie you guys made about it? That sentiment should have accompanied you onto this new venture - especially as it is a long-term one... Somehow, I don't feel it; in every sketch, every interview, every skit... I just do not feel ''it'' there... And that is sad, indeed. Thank God (?) now that Drew has found new friends to wipe her tears away - considering what a roller-coaster ride the Red Sox season has been so far, too... But that's... something else!)
In both cases, of course, the tradition of an opening monologue is dutifully honored: and anything and everything can be used as cannon-fodder for the joke-du-jour here. There appears to be no subject too touchy for this process nowadays: if it's in the news, it can be used, end of story! Now, if such handling of taboo topics was done in a spirit of ''let's make people conscientious of things, open up their perspective, invite them to take action and improve things around them'' on a consistent basis, rather than simply ''create content'' to amuse and diffuse, ultimately, attention by deviating it towards themselves in order to help their ratings... It would be entirely different, then.
But it is not - and will never be.
If either one of the Jimmys truly ''gets involved'' during any given interview, with any given guest, at any given time - it is, once again, just to extirpate the maximum of mirth from an otherwise ordinary, even boring bloke sometimes...
Now imagine if either Jimmy - or any one of the other guys presently doing this; or anyone who has ever been given the chance to do this - imagine if they had had the mind of a visionary, the wit of an innovator, the sharpness of a revolutionary? They could seize the opportunity given to them here and become the catalyst of much-needed change, be it social, economical or otherwise...! However, Johnny himself never bothered; he was only too content to rake in the dough for his golden retirement fund, and that was pretty much it. None of his predecessors did much towards that either; so why would any of the new guys dare - and risk getting booted off their soapbox in the process?
I jest, in reality - but one remembers Morton still, no? Some sort of activism, on a parallel with all that fluff generated for the shows, can be desired and can be worthy too... (And no: not even Jon does that - not even him...)
Otherwise, it is all meaningless fluff indeed, easily consumed and just as easily discarded...
For who will preserve recordings of any of these skits, monologues and assorted ''TV moments'' nowadays: who will even bother to make up a playlist on YouTube with any of it?
No one - save the network itself, that is!
Why? Because all this ''content'' is trivial at best - when it is controversial, there is no meat to the bone - if you know what I am screaming here...?
And it is, so often, not even all that funny either...!
These dudes peddle tired jokes to not-so-difficult audiences...
Not what *we* are all about here - nope...
Sempre Por O Melhor
+++
posted by Luminous (\ô/) Luciano™ at 7:00 AM
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